Hello, my name is Ralph, and I am an intern at Warner Bros. Studios. Eight months ago, a company called Valve came to our studio to see if we can make a movie about their very popular game Team Fortress 2. After some character plot recognition, we made a compromise to make it.
Now it is today. The movie is finished, and ready for a test screen. I am so excited to see all of our hard work come into this marvel. As the director put the disc in, the movie started.
The movie was supposed to involve 9 mercenaries who work together to stop some one named Grey Mann who plans to replace them with robots.
The movie starts with the average warning about copying discs, you know. After that, the movie really begins.
It starts with a camera view of the the hot desert sun when a rocket launches and explodes. As the mercenaries scramble to a point to capture it, the dialogue is shown below:
-Soldier: Capture the point!
-Scout: I'm coming, Helmethead!
-Soldier: Engie!
-Engineer: Yeah?
-Soldier: Build a Dispenser, I'm Dying!
-Engineer: Alright!
~Enemy Sniper shoots Engineer in the cranium~
-Enemy Sniper: Now ''that'' is what ya do!
The movie froze then for 4 seconds, where it went back on again to see an enemy Engineer, only difference besides color, is that his head was diamond-shaped, and his mouth was squished vertically, and he did not speak, only grunt. He started going for an enemy Demo, which he brutally dismembered. Not only that, he ripped the flesh of of him. He did so to all the others, including his team.
Then he finally spoke real words:
-''I made you a bone pile, do you like it?''
My reflex lunged to the DVR, but before i could reach it, my vision obscured to static, and then the Engineer appeared, with static behind him.
-''I am your god. I am Vagineer.''
I woke up in a cold, dark room. I got up to find out I was in a cage made of bones, and I had no time to find out whose. this can't be real''
-''Now, you stay here.''
He then built a sentry and killed me with it.
I then woke again on the watching room floor. "Are you alright?" my co-worker Marcus asks. "Yes, I am fine, I just had this dream where I was in this cage and Vagi-" "Ralph, we all had the same dream. He is after us."
Oh, God. I know it.